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Closer to the last
I've just heard,
Can you believe the news?
I'm not growing any younger
Each breath leads closer to the last
Just hold my breath
That should do the trick
I've saved a breath, added a few seconds to the
last
At the end I'll cash them in, winning tickets at
the race
I must be careful not to breathe to deep
No exertion I'm too busy staying alive
But what if I'm drawn like fateful Oedipus to patricide
My attempt to thwart fate twisted back
The breath I stole never meant to exist at all
The mouth on the mayfly is my hope
So busy trying to stay alive I've forgot to live.
Analysis and Background
This poem was written in 1996;
the first person I showed the poem to was apalled.
Why would I possibly want to write such a depressing
poem? I hadn't thought of it as depressing. I thought
it was clever, witty, and tongue in cheek. If you
didn't, go back and read it again. Okay, there,
you see? Quite obviously the poem is about trying
to cheat fate, only to find that Fate has cheated
you. The inspiration for this poem is Greek and
Roman myth. Stories like Hercules and Oedipus are
full of people and gods who try to avoid the prophesies
written about them, only to find that their plans
to avoid their fate are what brings about their
fate. For instance, Oedipus' fate was to kill his
father and marry his mother. Naturally his father
didn't like this idea, so he had Oedipus left in
the wilderness as an infant to die. Well a kindly
old codger adopted him and years later, Oedipus
killed a rude chariot driver, who guess what? just
happened to be his father.
The poem takes a cynical view of
our reaction to realizing that we are mortal and
will eventually die. It points out that for all
our scheming, we will never be able to escape our
own death, our own fate. The literary reference
to Oedipus is quite obvious in the poem, but a lesser
know allusion is to the heavy metal band Dream Theater.
Their song Pull
Me Under provided the actual framework for the
poem, each breath bringing us closer to the last.
"Grains of sand falling from
the hourglass of life." I like that line, but
couldn't work it into the poem. It was just too
pompous sounding. As I like to say, I think I'm
addicted to air; no matter how many times I try
to stop breathing, I always go back to it. I just
can't stop.
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